Friday, April 13, 2018
In a car driving down the highway. I decide to turn around, back along another road.
I see a white RCMP Police car. As I pass it, I look in the window and two photogenic Police Officers, a middle aged man silver grey hair, and a middle aged woman, long blonde hair, maybe I recognize them from television, look right at me and smile a quirky authoritative Police smile.
I turn left and walk down a small tiny trail. I see some flattened corpses of dead dogs.
Just then I turn around and see a man in a sleigh but with two huge golden chow dogs. I reach out to pet one and the one one my left and the sleigh driver's right bites my hand. It doesn't hurt too much though.
Sigh, I was thinking of suicide again recently.
If women don't like me, that's because life doesn't like me, well then I don't like life either, so why not end it, or modify it?
Ending one's life is a misnomer. One never dies. It's more like modifying one's life from living in this dimension part time and the afterlife dimension part time to a life where I'm living in the afterlife dimension full time.
Drop out of life, like dropping out of school. Quit life, like quitting a job. That's the ideal but not the reality.
Anyways, the Police car was to tell me not to do it. The two dogs, like Cerberus, the guardian dogs at the gates of hell was to tell me not to do it. That one of them bit my hand. Animals will sometimes bite my hand in dreams, again to tell me nonverbally not to use my hand to commit suicide.
Looking back, I have to realize that the cops in the dream knew about the golden chows that were then coming up.
The dreams I had over the last few days, weeks were really good. All kinds of celebrities, politicians, even Royalty and golden chow dogs visited me. That means I am loved. I should know this. I won't do myself in, although I wonder if I'm living in the right town.
Today, I saw the Mayor of the town as the Mayor rode past me. At first at a distance, I didn't know it was the Mayor.
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Friday, April 20, 2018
I was with a lady who really liked me. Then at one point, I was walking her to the airport. We sat in a room with benches in the airport lounge for a minute then putting my left arm around her I told her I loved her. Then she was with her female coach. She seemed to turn on me and walked away with the coach.
This upset me. I walked away and then through an area that was under construction. A large room with scaffolding. I said, "Cracker, you tell them something good and in return, they offer you something bad and turn on you." A guy was walking with me to my right, briefly, as I was saying this. Maybe the spiritual guide or the spiritual equivalent of an agent.
I then walked towards the scaffolding.
I was being naive again. In the movie Notting Hill when Hugh Grant visits Julia Roberts at the film set where she is an actress, she acts dismissively towards Hugh Grant despite their friendship. When Hugh Grant asks her about it, she said it was an act that she had to put on because her director was there. And it was to protect Hugh Grant from the paparazzi. She was thinking two steps ahead.
Because of the celebrity scandal driven industry. In the dream, that girl didn't want to show the coach how much she liked me, for some reason. Maybe for protective reasons, because maybe she's a ghost of the dead. As a protective measure they often prevent you from getting too close if they know that you don't know that they're dead.
Ghosts don't always send messages that the conscious mind can receive. They often send messages that the subconscious mind can perceive even if the conscious mind doesn't.
