Friday, July 1, 2022
I was with some Chinese people. Details that seemed so vivid then are lost now. Night time. I was in a room about to make out with a young Chinese lady who I had seen earlier in the dream. Then I heard a voice in the distance yell loudly, "It stinks!" I led that Chinese lady to quickly run away to another place in the distance. We didn't run as much as float and teleport quickly away as in dreams we are spirits rather than physical people.
Day time. I was in the hotel I love in now. I was walking down the hall to visit Heather who I refer to as "Beebs." she was in a room with a window. She was lying down on her left side. She was wearing blue. She had a blue blanket and lying down on a blue futon diagonally on the middle of the floor. I gave her three small pieces of onion.
I ordered onion rings the day following this dream, remembering the dream.
Saturday, July 2, 2022
I was at a bar at night. A comic book store employee gave me three packs of Star Wars cards worth $20 each. He let me borrow them to look at them.
I took them outside to a blue green rectangular box mailbox, unwrapped the packaging and looked at the cards. Then I walked to the middle of the street. As a car passed, I did a 70s disco dance move. I said, "What's happening!" as my cousin once taught me to say. It then occurred to me that as I get older the silly ways I was when I was younger were being used in a more mature way with age.
I went back to the bar. I sang a song that I haven't remembered for a long time from the movie Grease which was a musical. Maybe I should watch the movie, I thought. Then I saw John Candy. He was wearing a checked shirt, white with thin black stripes forming checkers and his hair was tied up in a bun like a hippie. Weird dream.
Then I remembered a detail of Star Wars. Luke had made an arrangement with Greedo to bring lots of weapons to the resistance to fight the Death Star. Blaster and lightsabers. At the time the detail seemed so accurate. Upon waking, this weird detail never happened in Star Wars.
I saw the comic book employee again. I refused to get the cards. Then I asked him if I was in over my head in deciding not to get the cards. He said I was as I unwrapped the packaging. I was then thinking that the comic book store could repackage them using a type of glue anyways.
I then gave him $20 for one pack of cards anyways. Instead he gave me two rare magazine clippings of pictures of Star Wars. One picture was of some astromech droids like R2D2 all lined up in a hangar. I showed these pictures to my brother who was somehow also there.
Then I saw two yellow Styrofoam statues about one foot long. These immediately reminded me of angels. Then I saw a large yellow Styrofoam Easter egg anout two feet in length. I then remembered what Lorna Byrne said on YouTube. That we all have two guardian angels and one more powerful Archangel guarding and protecting us. End of dream.
In a dream I had in 2004, I saw my two guardian angels. Unlike regular people that were opaque and emitted no light, the angels were golden and glowing from the inside! I never saw the Archangel assigned to me in that dream, though. I think the Archangel is only seen when one dies. Lorna Byrne saw the Archangel but she once did have a near death experience.
Lorna Byrne sees not only her angels but the angels of other people and not only while sleeping having a dream but while awake as well.
Upon awakening, I thought of the words of the Lord's Prayer, Your kingdom come, Your will be done on Earth as it is in heaven.
May life be and it sometimes is as sweet as the dreams we sometimes have at night.
Angels won't always show up in a dream. They work on their own schedule as to when they will show up. Most often they will deliver signs such as dreaming of things that are yellow or gold. Even in waking life if I see two yellow taxis or even people wearing two yellow shoes it reminds me of the presence of angels in my life.
I can't remember how many times I've seen yellow things in my dreams that remind me of angels.
If an angel shows up in your dreams, you are set for life. Angels see things in you that you don't see in yourself. They have already seen your future and you are deemed clean. Angels never make a mistake.
Angels appearing in your dreams is better than being rich. There are millionaires and even billionaires that never saw any angels in their dreams ever.
Like God does, angels don't judge you based on your deeds. They see your heart.
I had the dream of angels at the Glory Hotel in Vancouver. It occurred to me today that an anagram of glory is orgyl. In Thailand, r is often if not always pronounced as n. Orgyl become ongyl, angel.
Morning nap: 10.30am to 11:30am
I was in the downtown eastside. I was trying to leap from one side of the alleyway between the Royal Bank and Garlane pharmacy on Hastings at Main to the other. One side had a higher curb. I tried leaping from the lower curb to the higher curb. There were others around, homeless and street people. They were quiet, unassuming and friendly and did not seem to mind at all that I was there. I then had the insight that it would work better if I leapt from the higher side to the lower side. I had my PSP playstation portable with me.
Then I saw my cousin Gordy. At first I was irritated as I didn't want to see him. He then had me trade my playstation portable for his as he wanted to look at my PSP. His PSP was more advanced. It had a pinball game on it made up of plastic figures. It seemed so real like there was a glass over plastic figures but then I felt the screen. It was a 2D image but very realistic like 16K resolution. When he handed me back my PSP he gave me a game cartridge that uploaded and stored all my games. It was a special cartridge.
I looked at Gordy and he smiled softly. I saw then that he resembled his father George very much as he used to smile like that. It was then that I wept softly, bittersweet tears of love. I couldn't stop weeping. Gordy slowly walked away as I was on a bus. I was still weeping. He looked back at me. He was not weeping as if to say that there was no need to weep.
Sweet dream.
Sunday, July 3, 2022
I was teaching in Japan. The students were all around me seated at large rectangular tables. I forgot my notes. I still taught them English.
It was a long dream much of it forgotten.
At one point I told the students about the Bucky ball, the geodesic dome. I wrote the word Buckingham Palace because it resembled the word Bucky.
I saw one Japanese female student. She had her large breasts exposed. That aroused me.
Overall I felt that I was truly happy in Japan.
Monday, July 4, 2022
I dreamed that I was visiting the United States. Daytime. I was at a aquarium. There was a boy in a tank with a large alligator. I yelled about this. The boy's father came to the bank and scooped the boy out. Just then the alligator bit the fathers hand and wouldn't let go. I went to the side of the tank that looked right into the alligator's face and did a drum rhythm right on the glass of the tank. The alligator let go.
Then I walked into another tank. A little girl was in the tank where there was a larger alligator with a strangely shaped snout as it was a thin snout and facing at a downwards angle. I quickly scooped the girl out myself.
Then I was wondering about the States allowing people in who smoke marijuana. Then I thought that as long as you didn't smoke 24 hours prior to visiting.
Then I flew down a hill at night. Then at the bottom of the hill, Matt Damon was there leading a procession of people walking down a road.
A dream of visiting the United States had on the 4th of July.
I feel that I lack the energy and the courage to visit the United States. A lot of very famous YouTubers travel a lot. They have the courage to travel. I would like to have the courage to travel again.
Tuesday, July 5, 2022
Last night I had a few dreams about 4 and although vivid at the time, I forgot them except the last one during a morning nap from 9 am to 10 am.
I visited a Native small town in the North. I ordered cookies from a McDonald's restaurant there. Then I saw a Native guy who used to be a security guard. He is a fat and tall guy. He was the Mayor of the Northern town now. I called him Mr Mayor. I went to McDonald's in that town again. The cashier said that they were presently out of cookies but currently we're baking more. I said that I didn't want cookies this time, I wanted to order a fishburger. Dream over.
Wednesday, July 6, 2022
At a store, I found a white rice cooking pot that was used. There was an East Indian lady at the cashiers place. I asked for a two thirds discount on account that it was used. She gave me the discount. A short time after, I returned and I asked her for the receipt. She said I already had it. I looked in my pocket and it didn't look like a receipt it had a bunch of squiggles on it. Maybe it was because she sold it to me at such a discount, I thought.
Another dream: walking down the street, I found some crabs. Crab meat and a crab. I picked up most of it as a couple of other people were picking it up off the street. I picked up one whole crab. I saw Sasur Lee the Canadian iron chef. I asked him how to cook the crab. I gathered that I had to steam it and then fry it with lots of legumes like onion ginger and garlic.
I walked and found a little but more crab meat after that.
Then I was in a food warehouse small room with a Chinese manager. I told him that my life was going nowhere and that I thought of ending my life. He was disturbed to hear this and talked with another senior manager about it.
Then I saw a Chinese restaurant that I knew from the 70s. I think it was Diamond Palace restaurant but it looked clean, shiny, pristine and restored. The paint was shiny and new and glistening. I went into the restaurant. There was already a bunch of Chinese people there. A lot. I gather that they had died and it was a waiting area. I sat on a couch. Then someone told me that they were going to put on a film about me and my future since I expressed a wish to commit suicide. I thought, this is it. I'm dying. The film started. There was a bunch of five pointed stars in space. A Chinese guy to the left of me wearing a white long sleeve shirt with a collar and buttons grabbed my left arm hard. I thought he was pulling me towards death. The film went on for a short time after but it showed nothing conclusive. Then I woke up.
I woke up somewhat afraid as I do every morning. The only reward I get for making it through a day of fear is yet another day of fear tomorrow. That's the entirety of my life right now. My fears are meaningless to God for what He is and for what He means and is doing in my life.
Last night I listened on headphones to binaural beats, for overthinking, worry and fear. It helped.
When one wakes up, cortisol courses through the body. It helps one to wake up but also causes fear. Cortisol is the chemical the body generates when there is pain like plantar fasciitis which I cured through massaging that area of the foot.
Thursday, July 7, 2022
Get ready for another avalanche of crazy. I'll tell you what I think I saw. This dream is very very crazy.
I was in Vancouver having just moved there, in my dream. It was so real. At that moment I missed Victoria BC and it felt strange to live in a town where Heather isn't there.
Wake up and sleep again and then a quick vision of young Queen Elizabeth facing to the right and firing a machine gun turret aboard a World War 2 long military truck. She had a grimacing face as she fired the machine gun. Sitting behind her on the military truck was King George the 6th. He was wearing a greenish grey military uniform and matching military cap. His face was so unmistakable that I flinched when I saw him. Princess Margaret was there seated behind him and facing in the opposite direction as they were both seated with their backs towards the center of the truck. George was seated facing to the right so I could see his right hand side of his face in profile. Princess Margaret was seated facing to the left wearing the same kind of greenish grey military uniform but wearing a light blue green sash on top of her head. They were on a dirt road and there were trees behind them. The military truck was descending on a slight decline on a clear se tion of the road with grass on either side of the truck.
Then I walked around with my sister. I was then painting a picture of the current King of Thailand. One eye, the right eye, was higher than the other in the painting.
Then I was cutting a reddish purple scarf to match the scarf on a picture of a profile of a young girl.
Someone suggested that I have sex with my younger sister. I said, "No! I have to have a good heart and live with a good heart because that's what God wants me to do." Dream over. I don't care if you believe me. I hope I don't get in trouble for writing this. Royal dreams are a source of joy and anxiety for me. Joy because I see them. Anxiety because if I talk about it people either won't believe me or think that I'm crazy. Perhaps because of my station in life, it would be inappropriate and improper for me to dream of Royalty. But it happens to me. I don't know why.
I wake up every morning with fear and uncertainty.
There is two kinds of vertical learning. In life, one kind of vertical learning is when someone knows of you and talks about you to people to be born in the future such as their children and grandchildren and even in some cases great grandchildren. In the afterlife, the other kind of vertical learning is when someone knows of you in this life, dies and then talks about you in the afterlife to people who died one, two, three or even more generations ago in the past.
That might explain why I've seen some famous Royal figures in my dreams who died years, even a lot of years before I was born.
I doubt this has only happened to me. I'm sure that a lot of people have seen in their dreams images of Royal figures who died years before they were born.
Friday, July 8, 2022
Riding in a car with a friend.
Then I go to the front door of a Catholic Church. Double doors. I open the door on the left and see a beautiful ceremony. A Priest dressed all in white with his back to the door. A few parishioners were lying face down in front of him like a Catholic Priest would during his investiture. The parishioners were all wearing red. I immediately closed the door sensing it was a secret and sacred ceremony.
I went into that Catholic Church afterwards and left something on the small podium sized table in the middle of the Church. This podium table was facing the door.
Monday, July 11, 2022
I visited the apartment of a blonde haired Polish lady. She had shoulder length hair. She thought that I didn't love her enough and was not suitable for her so I left. I wouldn't blame her for thinking that. I don't know how confident I am.
Then into the yard to look for some old books. Strange dream. Much of it forgotten though at the time it went on and on. It's like watching a movie. At the time the movie just goes on and on however after the movie, I am only able to remember certain scenes.
Tuesday, July 12, 2022
Last night I dreamed I was in a darkened room made of wood with Prince William and then in another similar room with Prince Harry. They were sitting across from me. The room with Prince Harry had a dog that was dark grey. The dog was trained to stand in a precise place. It was a long dream but much of it forgotten. The Princes didn't say anything to me. I was amazed that I had a Royal dream again. It brought a smile to my face. And I was amazed at how long I spent with them in the dream.
I saw three men leaning over Suzie's car parked outside the movie theatre which I later went to today to see the Elvis movie. One of them was the old man with the small white dog. I didn't see Suzie.
I bought some noodles for my stepmother. 4 bowls of noodles wrapped in transparent plastic for $28 at $7 each. My stepmother was standing outside the room where my father was in. He looked dark and shadowy. I wanted to present the noodles to my stepmother while she was standing in the room where my father was and not while she is standing in the hallway.
I was riding a bus, the front left side seats. There wa no back to the seats so I faced outwards and my legs and feet were poking through holes in the bus that were there. A girl was riding outside the bus holding on to a vertical bar where the driver was. My shoelace on my left foot broke in three places. I tried to tie them together using a reef knot but I couldn't do it.
Wednesday, July 13, 2022
I saw my father at a restaurant a block from where our family used to live. In the dream, the restaurant was located in a place that there was no restaurant there in real life. In the dream, my father is very old but looked young. He was going to that restaurant to get bacon and English muffin for breakfast. Then he led me down a trail that led home but it was a trail that I didn't know before during the years I used to live there.
More to the dream but now forgotten.
Thursday, July 14, 2022
I was at a Library trying to find a novel about Hong Kong called Hang Nail. I couldn't find it. It was a white paperback book. I went into the Librarians Office and saw the chief librarian. He was wearing a Grey suit, white shirt and a purple tie. He gave me an illustrated children's coffee table book about Shanghai. The book was so beautiful that I wept soft tears of joy when I looked through it.
Long line up stretching for blocks at a morning food line near where the old house where I lived with my family was. There was snow on the ground. I got into the food shelter. I didn't get any food but was singing the Rolling Stones song Angie.
Friday, July 2022
With my stepmother and step brother. He did an animated cartoon of a man in an office with shelves and books. It looked really good but also lokked rotoscoped. My stepmother said that he'd soon be popular on YouTube because of this. I said that I won't be popular because people don't really like me.
Then at a cannabis shop. I bought some pot but saw a lump of black cannabis. "What's that?" I asked a lady who worked there. She said it was moot. Moot is apparently a type of blackened cannabis leaves mixed with black hash.
Saturday, July 16, 2022
I went to Prince Rupert. I was going to live there again. I visited the college there. I thought the small town was a backwater with barely any infrastructure.
Then I played Pinball. There were some Pinball tables. One of the Pinball tables shot out a couple of newspaper clippings from the Sunday comics section out of the coin slot. I caught the clipping with my right hand and I looked at the clippings. One of them was a picture of Hagar the Vikings white dog Cesar. The Pinball table was called Vikings.
It was a Royal moment and I get that often in my dreams. Viking is an anagram of King VI, in reference to King George the 6th.
I might have a royal medical condition in that I am always and often seeing Royal figures in my dreams. I wonder why that is. I really do. I'm not complaining. It feels good when it happens although also slightly shocking.
I played the Pinball table and a Native man was there. I said, "What was the nickname of the German monarchy? The fun house."
I sensed that I had a lot of money. I went to treat some friends to a pizza restaurant but we wound up going to a Chinese restaurant. It was the Chinese restaurant in Dawson Creek. There was a manager working there. I asked," Where's Allan the manager? "
The manager there, wearing a blue green shirt said, "He's on vacation."
I then said, "If the other employees ask me 'Yu droong nai?' I'd answer, "Yu nee, na, Yu na, na. '" In Thai that meant, Where do I put this? Put it here, put it there.
An Oriental guy who was sitting at the table laughed. He thought it was funny. End of another weird dream.
Afternoon nap 5pm to 6:30pm
Really crazy but really good.
I walked into a Church. I saw an old woman whom I had known before. She had white curly round bouffant hair. She was friendly. Really friendly. She had nylons stocking on. She was otherwise wearing a knee length wool coat. I do have a thing for ladies who are old! I asked if I could sit next to her. She agreed. I sat to her left. She was seated to my right. She then opened her legs and I saw her shaved vagina. She invited me to touch her vagina. She then nodded her head as I put my fingers, four fingers instead of three into her vagina. Her vagina wrapped around my fingers and she was tight! She leaned back and I rested my head on her breasts. When I had finished doing this, I sat with her for awhile. Some members of Royalty came into the room. I rested my head against this old woman and then Princess Kate was seated two rows in front of me and she was looking right at me!
I then was touring an old Royal castle with a guide. The hallways we were walking though was dimly lit and was lit only with the white cloudy sky sunlight from outside coming in through the windows. There were red curtains everywhere but the rest of the castle was made with dark brown wood. It seemed like a castle from the 1800s.
I thought that perhaps the old woman from before would be the and I looked for her but never saw her again.
I looked into a room with a fireplace. There were two identical paintings without frames, only the tapestries, one painting hung on top of another.
It was paintings of a horse near a forest. The paintings looked unfinished. There was a lot of white in the paintings. They looked like prints. "Are they original paintings" I asked. The guide said that the Queen only had original paintings.
Then a few Police Officers showed up. One of them led me into a side room to show me a Royal artifact from the 1800s. I made sure to say, "Wow!" I then went back into the hallway room where I was earlier. The Police chief was happy to meet me and showed me a cloth swatch that was supposed to have a badge on it but it was empty. Someone pointed it out and I looked to my left, the actual shiny gold badge was left sitting on a chair.
God is in the details.
Then I went into another room. There were washing machines and standing video game consoles such as those from the 80s. I said a joke, and acting it out as I said it. "Why does a gay guy go Rrrrrrr Rrrrrrr Rrrrrrr as he goes into a room?" As I was saying this, some people leave the room. I went on to say, "He is acting, because if he says hi squeakily, no guy will be attracted to him." I was laughing as I said this. Then I looked at a TV screen. Apparently I had been acting before and I was saying "Dean! Dean!" in a squeaky voice. Seeing this I was on the ground rolling around and laughing. I wa thinking the thought just then, "I must be healed from my PTSD because I'm laughing again."
I do have a thing for ladies who are old which I think it's somewhat weird and I often wonder if I wasted my whole life because of this as for decades, I've been into women who are old. Whatever floats your boat, I guess.
Monday, July 18, 2022
I went into a store. With the shopkeeper we discussed that there was a historical robbery in the store that started with a small thin piece of Chinese cabbage being sliced in half lengthwise.
Then I went into an old Chinese restaurant. I wanted to order small disc shaped pieces of ribe eye steak with a small circular bone in the center. I saw an old Chinese man.
Tuesday, July 19, 2022
I was working at Earl's restaurant in Vancouver. Someone sang, "When I was 17...." I completed the sentence singing, "it was a very good year."Strange, I didn't think I knew the lyrics to the song. It wasn't a song I ever thought of consciously. But subconsciously it was there because it appeared in my dreams. I mean, when was the last time I mentioned the song?
Then in a cardboard box on a metal shelf above the dishwashing station where I was working, I found a large rectangular orange-yellow piece of crack cocaine about three inches long and one inch deep and one inch wide.
For some reason I sliced off a piece of it. Little crumbs that looked like medium sized grains of salt were there as I sliced it. I wrapped it all in a small piece of paper. I didn't know why I did that. I don't smoke crack and I don't like to smoke crack. My life is screwed up as it is without me smoking that crap.
Then I saw a commercial for crack cocaine. If crack was legal and had television commercials, this is what it would look like. There were a few muscular and stubble faced surfer MMA guys wearing t-shirts and tank tops. sitting around a table. They had just smoked a hit of crack. One guy said "It's wet outside." Another guy, to my horror, reached into a small Ziploc baggie full of crack to get another hit. Another guy was eating cereal with milk and a floating small donut in a tall pink plastic cup. End of dream. I woke up feeling scared that I was crazy for having such a dream. The dream did have a pleasant feel to it.
When I die and go into the afterlife, I will miss hearing songs on my Walkman while watching YouTube videos of a walking tour of UBC. Listening to the song Hey DJ on my headphones while looking at videos of UBC on YouTube sure gives me a sweet feeling. UBC vibes. I can get the vibes just looking at a video. I don't have to be there but I sure miss the place. The impossible dream is for me to live at a place near UBC. If I got an inheritance but I come from a broken family situation or else if I got money for my cartoons and writing but Google owns anything you put on YouTube or blogger. One basically signs away their rights when they click agree. Therefore me living near UBC one day is an impossible dream. I'm going to have a dismal boring future that doesn't include living near or at UBC unless a miracle happens. How likely is that?
Listening to music and watching videos of UBC is just a means to an end. That end is the feeling of bliss produced. Heaven and the afterlife would have that bliss but magnified at all times and without needing to listen to music and seeing UBC. That's the ideal. I don't know if that's the reality. I hope that Church and religion isn't BSing us about heaven just so they can build an industry around people's fears and get their money. I often doubt that heaven is real. I think the afterlife will be just as scattered and random and chaotic as this life.
When we die. It switches off. But it's the other way around. The dream life is the real life and the waking life is the dream life as Carl Jung said. So when we die, it does switch off. This life switches off and we wake up forever in the dream world and repeatedly visit the places we most often went to in our dreams in life. Since time is irrelevant or else on a different dynamic in the afterlife as time travel is time experienced on an objective level, we experience a perpetual time loop that goes on forever. A non stop time loop. Otherwise there is no living forever in linear time as in a googol years later our souls are still alive in the afterlife. That couldn't happen. The only way we live forever is to be trapped forever in a repeating non ending time loop as we visit the holographic other dimensional carbon copy of places we visited or want to visit on Earth. That's my theory. I doubt that heaven is real even though Hayden Christiansen did a movie called Heaven Is Real.
That's why I'm scared every day. Life is random, messy and chaotic as so is the afterlife. Existence is a trap on either dimension and I wish my mother had never given me birth. I need to get a time machine to go back in time and prevent my birth through sending my mother a lot of money and telling her to go on an extended vacation starting from the time frame that I would have otherwise be conceived. I don't need to go back in time. All I need is a telephone that can make phone calls back in time and to convince someone to send my mother a lot of money. I have to call someone and tell them to bet money on a sports event or horse race. I will tell them who to bet on. Once they win, they have to send my mother a share of that money along with a letter telling her to go on vacation. If the person does that, then I will supply them a few more tips on sports events and horse races to bet on. But I'd have a narrow window of time to do that. Because once my mother goes on vacation, I would disappear into non existence. So the person sends the money through post that will take a few days. Within those few days will have to send them the sports tips before I disappear. It's like the Sports Almanac in Back to the Future 2. That has sports results that can make any person in the past rich. Then I will achieved my goal of avoiding existence. Life is a chaotic mess. The afterlife is a chaotic mess. Life gets worse. Real estate prices are out of reach. My friends mother worked at some fancy hotel and her mortgage payments were $50 a month and she was able to buy a house. This was two generations ago. My other friends father had a chance to purchase a couple of hundred acres of land on a mountain side near the city at a modest price. Now that land is all subdivided into many lots. Each lot is today worth more than the price that the entire mountain side is worth. I never got married. I was never able to live in a house. Just rooming houses with often delinquent neighbours although for some reason its a lot better now. My formerly delinquent neighbours are not so delinquent these days. Anyways I wasted my life. My mother wasted her time and energy giving me birth. I wish I could use a time machine and to perform a situational retroactive abortion. I need my mother to have never given me birth.
Thursday, July 21, 2022
Long dream much of it forgotten.
I saw Eddie Van Halen. He was wearing blue jeans and no shirt. He had no hair on his chest. His hair was all brown, no grey. He looked about 27 years old. He was somewhat muscular but not super muscular.
I asked him what it's like to break up with a band. He broke up with his band after he died, I guess. He answered, "Have you ever broken up with a girl?"
Then after, in the dream, I was having sex with a dark haired lady I know who lives near me. She was blo**** me.
Friday, July 22, 2022
Night. Nightmare. I went to a house where Emily Carr was interred. At the place where she was interred, instead I saw a rectangular hole in the floor. It wasn't a dirt hole, it was a hole that was lined and paved with tiles along the bottom and along the walls of the hole. I looked at it and waked away saying to myself, "Thank God for the gift of life." Part of a longer dream now forgotten.
Saturday, July 23, 2022
I saw the Asian guy from the movie The Killing Fields. I don't remember his name. We were walking along a pier in a foreign Asian land. We were on vacation. I thought we were supposed to learn a language. But a ride was waiting to take him off the pier towards home.
Then I saw a magazine with four pictures of him. One of him on a sampan boat. Another with him wearing a white long sleeve shirt with collars and bottons on a dock with water around him holding a machine gun and firing at the cameraman, basically firing up at me, but not actually firing because the cameraman would have been dead. It was just a pose. Then, really strange, I saw the left profile of the statue of Liberty. It was a replica statue of it and it was on a crate and leaning forward.
Weird dreams. I get scared. It's a vicious cycle. I have stress therefore I have weird dreams. I have weird dreams therefore I have stress.
I've often wondered if Cambodia is a death omen. Maybe or maybe not. A lot of people live there. It's quite a life affirming place. Otherwise no one would be there. For a small country, it has more people than Canada. But if Cambodia is a death omen I wonder if me having a dream about Cambodia means that I or someone very close to me will die soon. Time will tell.
I have to clarify shirt with collar and buttons otherwise the word could be mistaken for t-shirt.
Sunday, July 24, 2022
It often takes awhile for me to write down my dreams. I have to wrap my head around it and gather the courage to write about it because often my dreams are downright weird and crazy.
Last night I dreamed that I walked into a room. There was a tailor there. I was wearing a reddish-pink dress with built in fake small pointy boobs with a skirt that went to the knees made with a light sweater material. It was a strapless low cut dress with no sleeves or arms. I was attached to the dress and didn't want to part with it.
Which is so unlike my waking life. I've never worn a dress ever not even for plays or pantomimes. I've said that I wouldn't be caught dead wearing a dress. I would never want to wear a dress.
However in England, British male boarding school is known for plays and pantomimes where dresses are worn. "He's not gay, he's British." The cast of Monty Python wore dresses for their skits and they all went on to marry beautiful wives. That part of the dream made me feel ashamed when I woke up. Wtf!
Weird dreams are normal. I've heard women tell me that they had dreams where they had a penis. Dreams are batshit crazy weird.
The next part of the dream. I went to a small mini mall located at a strip mall neighborhood. The building was made of red brick. I was slated to give an interview but a bunch of angry leftists showed up. End of dream nebulous dream.
Monday, July 25, 2022
I was in Dawson Creek with my old old Spanish friend Roderigo. He was about 50 years old or older in 1990 when he worked as a waiter which was about the last time I saw him. He was also an English teacher in Thailand and spent a lot of time there. He told me that he got addicted to heroin in Chiang Mai which is baffling because I thought drugs were illegal there and with stricter penalties than in N America although drugs are probably a lot cheaper there. Doing the math, I think Rodrigo died years ago especially being a junkie, how long could one live? Being a heroin junkie even when heroin was heroin and not the garbage that passes for heroin today that is cut with fentanyl and benzos is like playing a game of Russian roulette everytime a junkie shoots up.
Anyways, in the dream, Roderigo and I were building a house on a muddy yard using black duct tape to tape the frames and even the floor together in a type of joinery using black duct tape. Rodrigo was doing most of the house building. Somehow when he finished the house looked like a nice and normal house. Then he had to start building another house all over again.
Then I was in a hallway. A coke dealer had cocaine in small baggies. The cocaine was in small two inch square grey flat plastic tubes. The dealer squeezed out his cocaine out of one of the tubes which appeared as a brown oily substance onto a few sugarcubes on a tray of sugarcubes. For some damned reason I tried one of the sugarcubes. In real life I wouldn't touch cocaine. Drugs are garbage and the best way to live is clean and sober. Besides my life is messed up as it is with my anxiety and my somewhat messy room which I would like to clean down to looking like a zen minimalist IKEA showroom. Yeah, it was a weird dream that involves drugs. After I die, is my afterlife going to be one weird scene like this after another? Then I'm not looking forward to dying. There's no telling what my brain will generate as I sleep every night and have yet another strange dream. Dreams are involuntary, there's no conscious process so even though drugs are illegal, having dreams about drugs isn't illegal otherwise we'd all be busted.
If you have strange dreams at night, you're not alone.
Tuesday, July 26, 2022
I went to the Library and borrowed a book.
Then I went into a multistory building. I saw two Natives sitting leaning against a wall. The man was seated next to the woman, seated on her left. I saw their left profile as I entered the room. I sat down next to the man. I told them about my ghost NDE in Dawson Creek. I said that an OBE is a dream where it feels like you're awake but you also know you're dreaming. I told them about the woman with a black veil over her face. I reenacted the moment when she crossed the threshold and looked right at me and then walked on. The Native man had blacked veins running all over his face giving his face a blackened appearance.
I left them and I forgot to tell them about the angels I saw.
As I walked up the stairs on the slim rectangular wood railing was a drawing of a blonde haired child angel dressed in a white robe with a halo over his head. I walked up the stairs and into the room and didn't see the Natives again. I also lost the Library book.
I was on Granville and Georgia on the Northeast corner looking West. There was a parade that ended with a lot of Police Officers. At first there was the mounted squad riding on horses. Then there was the foot patrol all wearing raincoats. The Police in this dream all had the green glow in the dark stripes with the word POLICE printed on it that they wear. They looked at me and I thought of last night when I was suicidal and thought that I wanted to give up on life and that I'm suicidal. They walked towards me slightly.
Then I walked into a small restaurant. Everyone was entitled to free food. There was a barbeque chicken sitting on a small table. I saw the chicken wing and used a knife to dig out and then get the chicken wing. I walked on and I think I lost that too. Why am I always losing things, I thought, first the library book and then the chicken wing.
Wednesday, July 27, 2022
I was drawing in a thin paperback book 1 and a half foot long and 3/4 of a foot wide from top to bottom and half an inch thick. It was made of all brown paper. I traced a design in it with black ink because the book had tracing paper. Then the book was placed in a rectangular glass cover with a wooden table on the bottom. I tried reaching for the book from under the glass cover for there was an open gap but someone else, a girl got it first.
Then I saw a young lady. She was wearing a skirt and a dark red thong. I felt her ass and then my hand went underneath more and my fingers felt her pussy through the thong she was wearing. Dream over.
Thursday, July 28, 2022
Morning dream.
I was in Thailand. There was a boat route, there was a straight waterway path then one path curved to the right and one to the left. At a point just before where the boat path curved to the left, was a dock with metal supporting rods that extended up six feet above the dock. I was thinking of doing a backward somersault but was told not to.
Then I saw a Thai young lady standing at the dock. I asked her a few questions in Thai. "Pom poot Thai dye nit noi. Khun deng aan rue yang? Khun tum ngan arai?" meaning, I speak a little bit of Thai. Are you married or not? What is your occupation? She said that she was already married or else I inferred that. A middle aged Thai lady a short distance away was seated at a park bench with other Thai ladies, she looked right at me and smiled.
I asked her, being next to her but standing aside of her not looking at her, I asked her, "Sami kong Khun tum ngan arai?" meaning, What is your husband's occupation?" when I turned to the left to look where she was standing, she wasn't there at all but a Thai gentleman was there wearing a white shirt with blue vertical stripes, the white and the blue each about three inches wide.
Then I walked through a department store like Army and Navy in Vancouver which has since closed. As I was walking through the shelves, I saw on a small flat screen television on the shelf, a granny porn video that looked very arousing to me. Robust granny with large breasts. There was a VCR cassette player with a VHS tape in it next to the small flat screen television. I floated through the night time streets thinking that I had to rent a porn videocassette as I had not for a long time and now was about time.
Then I saw the young lady I was talking to before at the dock. She was wearing a white t-shirt and green pants. I was about to talk to her some more, ask her some friendly casual questions in Thai but she outstretched her arms. We hugged. Then the dream was over but the way she outstretched her arms cutting me short of asking questions it was as if she sensed that the dream was about to end and that there was no time to ask questions.
When I woke up I thought that maybe I should go to a video store and rent a porn VHS video tape. Then it slowly occurred to me that I can watch porn in the internet so there is no need to rent a video cassette at the video store. Do they even have video stores anymore?
On this day, I saw a couple, a man and a woman each wearing matching Red Bull Racing shirts and Red Bull Racing baseball caps too which reminded me of my dream. It was an older White couple rather than a Thai couple. Whatever. Lots of White people like Thailand and visit Thailand often.
Sunday, July 31, 2022
I went to a Chinese restaurant in Vancouver at night. Someone told me about Fu Jow Chow Mie which is a type of fried rice noodle. The ingredients were rice Noodle, peanut sauce and sugar. So I ordered this at the restaurant. The cashier said, "This isn't available. Have you had enough of play acting as a Communist?"
Then I visited my old friend Qwan's house at night. His sister was there. Then four Chinese robbers burst into the house into the kitchen where we were all sitting. I wanted to escape so I asked if I could go to the washroom. I was thinking of jumping out the window.
When I got upstairs, just as I was about to jump out of a window in a bedroom, one of the robbers came into the room as I was about to do that. He spread a bunch of girlie magazines on the bed showing pictures of young Chinese women in bathing suits. I'm more into older women, I said. I told him about the restaurant not having that certain type of fried rice noodles.
Then I walked down the night time streets reflecting that the Chinese restaurants in London and other cities would have those kind of rice noodles, what was wrong with Vancouver?
After having this dream, I woke up in extreme fear as the dream was so vivid. The fear is a type of culture shock. Just as I was used to the culture and the pace of the dream, I am suddenly immersed into the culture and the pace of the waking world. There is a bit of an adjustment to be made.
